My second stop took me back a few years to 1 Samuel 3. Once again of course the call is rather quite apparent. Too audible for my time in the here and now I suppose. I hear a voice. “Hey Matt.” I have the option to roll over and sleep. I guess I could ignore it. What would be the harm that? Of course on this trip I don’t have that option. So I get up and rush over to talk with my head priest. Oh what joyous fun. ^_^ I think there are serious times when I need to talk with other people over what my calling is. It has to be with a teacher of some sort I think, a mentor, some one I respect and will be able to help me with this call.
Well we talk and I sleep, again I hear, “Matt.” It be nice to sleep you know God, but you’re keeping me up with this constant badgering. Not that I say that to God, heck I don’t know if its him yet. I’m still perhaps not quite bold enough yet. I get up and talk with my priest again, which I suppose we is what I have to do. I have to talk with people, for a little bit to help me figure out what’s going on. (Of course I’m certain I’m inferring way too much with my walks but what have you). I really need to find someone I guess that I can talk to, to help figure out what’s going on. Curse this shyness of mine. So I hear God calling me several times, and well I talk several more times.
Until my Priest tells me that all I have left to do is talk with God now. You know like Eli realized that Samuel had to say hey God you’re servant is listening. I can hardly wait . . . So I’m sitting in my bed again and you know, I guess chilling? Trying to sleep, God calls. “Matt!” I think for a moment, I guess i need to answer him. “God speak for your servant is listening.”
“Good.” Then Yahweh tells me his message to speak. It’s not good again. “Lord.” I ask. “Can I talk of good things?”
“Matt.” Yahweh has this aura smile. “What do you think the people need?”
“Repentance.” I Answer, to which I continued. “So yeah… I guess not.” Samuel was so willing and so quick to call out to God. He seems to have no issues or anything. I’m certainly not that willing. . . I have to wonder if God’s going to call me one night when I can’t sleep. I look at God, (Elohim) “God you call people in so may different times and places. I’m getting confused.”
“You mean like Moses at the bush my angel hung out at?” God asks, I ponder if it hypothetical. “Or like Abraham’s call to go to Canaan?”
“Something like that.”
“You might understand someday, but c’mon I’ve to other great guys to show you.” I frown as God disappears and I have to walk down to the next scene. I do ponder, why couldn’t Jophiel guide me when Yahweh disappears? “Praise Yahweh. . .”
– Le Bel Inconnu